Hebrews 8:14
FOR THIS IS THE COVENANT THAT I WILL MAKE
....AFTER THOSE DAYS, SAYS THE LORD:
I WILL PUT MY LAWS INTO THEIR MIND AND UPON
THEIR HEARTS I WILL WRITE THEM...
Hebrews 8:14
Some people do not understand my obsession for a new heart. Most hear me and then point to the cross, grace and the santification process.
What I can´t seem to make them grasp is that I do understand these concepts BUT that last year my eyes were opened to a terrifying truth:
For 40 years I had used those concepts to stop God's work in my heart.
I did not use them to draw near God seeking that heart described above. A heart which is imprinted with God's law.
What does that mean? It means one's heart pumps the law of God throughout the whole body. In your very veins the law of God nurtures your patterns of thought and your smallest reactions...love God and love thy neighbor.
Such is the heart God desires. Such was His ambition when Jesus went to the cross.
I would say "I am not under the law, because I am under the new covenant, a much better covenant"...nice words "If you see sin in my life, well just understand that I am on the santification process"...right words.
The problem was that I was not really on the santification process. I was not really allowing God to deal with sin in my heart.
All along the only thing I had done was to mortify sin, to set limits to sin. But nothing more.
In Hebrews 10 it speaks of why the sacrifices had to be done,over and over and over again:
Because they can NEVER make perfect the ones
that give them.
As I read that scripture I thought, that is me, I haven´t changed (not inside)I keep going up to God, "sorry, again" and that is all. It is good to find forgiveness...but what about the change?
Then I understood why Hebrews 9:14 was so important:
HOW MUCH MORE WILL THE BLOOD OF CHRIST,...,
CLEANSE YOUR CONSCIENCE FROM THE WORKS
THAT DRIVE YOU TO DEATH...
THAT was God's intention from the start. Not only forgiveness but real honest to goodness change.
"Bea, you have been in the church all your life and you hadn't understood this? Beatriz Gasca THAT is the gospel...what have you been preaching?"
Well, that is why God called me a hypocrite. I preached the gospel but had never really let it sink down into my heart.
(how embarrasing having to admit it in public...)
I loved my sin more than God, so I hung onto my sin and limited God.
Awesome God, patient God, faithful God...He...wow
40 years I have lived in such a shameful way.
1 year I was confronted by God.
Now I am giving all to catch up...I need a new heart.
Let me add one more key factor. When I saw all this I realized that I did not really believe I could be a new creation, I did not really believe the change could be that deep...to reach to my heart.
God and I had a serious one to one talk. "Lord, do you understand how serious this is? You call me hypocrite, but then if I do not get a new heart-if You cannot create me anew- well then I will have to stop preaching and teaching your word."
Lord knew how serious things were. He did not smile, He looked straight into my face and said "Beatriz Gasca, I want you to listen and listen well. If you do not allow me to give you a new heart, then I want you to stop preaching and teaching my word."
Now, do you begin to understand my compulsion for a new heart?
It goes beyond that, God also made me understand once and for all that if I did not change I would not have the authority to proclaim change to others, then I would merely be proclaiming a moral life with different colors, and He wasn't interested in that. People of most religions preach on a moral life, good deads and peace unto others. Why be a missionary? Why sacrifice so much...to say basically the same thing? (live a moral life)
"No Bea, if such is the case I rather you leave people alone.Let them live under their societies in peace...just leave them alone"
I do not know if I can find words to describe the impact that these words had on me...
all I can say is:
I NEED A NEW HEART
and I cannot wait another 40 years to see if I get it.
I cannot and will not use Bible verses to stop God's discipline, God's confrontation, God's dealing in my life. NOT ANYMORE. I have done it enough, and enough is enough.
One last thing. Important thing.
If I am writing this it is because I have seen how God has had the power and wisdom and courage and strenght and love and care and so many things more...TO Deal with my heart.
I do see change in my heart. We still have a long ways to go, but we have done a lot. So this is why I now bodly write out:
The blood of Jesus can purify a heart.
....AFTER THOSE DAYS, SAYS THE LORD:
I WILL PUT MY LAWS INTO THEIR MIND AND UPON
THEIR HEARTS I WILL WRITE THEM...
Hebrews 8:14
Some people do not understand my obsession for a new heart. Most hear me and then point to the cross, grace and the santification process.
What I can´t seem to make them grasp is that I do understand these concepts BUT that last year my eyes were opened to a terrifying truth:
For 40 years I had used those concepts to stop God's work in my heart.
I did not use them to draw near God seeking that heart described above. A heart which is imprinted with God's law.
What does that mean? It means one's heart pumps the law of God throughout the whole body. In your very veins the law of God nurtures your patterns of thought and your smallest reactions...love God and love thy neighbor.
Such is the heart God desires. Such was His ambition when Jesus went to the cross.
I would say "I am not under the law, because I am under the new covenant, a much better covenant"...nice words "If you see sin in my life, well just understand that I am on the santification process"...right words.
The problem was that I was not really on the santification process. I was not really allowing God to deal with sin in my heart.
All along the only thing I had done was to mortify sin, to set limits to sin. But nothing more.
In Hebrews 10 it speaks of why the sacrifices had to be done,over and over and over again:
Because they can NEVER make perfect the ones
that give them.
As I read that scripture I thought, that is me, I haven´t changed (not inside)I keep going up to God, "sorry, again" and that is all. It is good to find forgiveness...but what about the change?
Then I understood why Hebrews 9:14 was so important:
HOW MUCH MORE WILL THE BLOOD OF CHRIST,...,
CLEANSE YOUR CONSCIENCE FROM THE WORKS
THAT DRIVE YOU TO DEATH...
THAT was God's intention from the start. Not only forgiveness but real honest to goodness change.
"Bea, you have been in the church all your life and you hadn't understood this? Beatriz Gasca THAT is the gospel...what have you been preaching?"
Well, that is why God called me a hypocrite. I preached the gospel but had never really let it sink down into my heart.
(how embarrasing having to admit it in public...)
I loved my sin more than God, so I hung onto my sin and limited God.
Awesome God, patient God, faithful God...He...wow
40 years I have lived in such a shameful way.
1 year I was confronted by God.
Now I am giving all to catch up...I need a new heart.
Let me add one more key factor. When I saw all this I realized that I did not really believe I could be a new creation, I did not really believe the change could be that deep...to reach to my heart.
God and I had a serious one to one talk. "Lord, do you understand how serious this is? You call me hypocrite, but then if I do not get a new heart-if You cannot create me anew- well then I will have to stop preaching and teaching your word."
Lord knew how serious things were. He did not smile, He looked straight into my face and said "Beatriz Gasca, I want you to listen and listen well. If you do not allow me to give you a new heart, then I want you to stop preaching and teaching my word."
Now, do you begin to understand my compulsion for a new heart?
It goes beyond that, God also made me understand once and for all that if I did not change I would not have the authority to proclaim change to others, then I would merely be proclaiming a moral life with different colors, and He wasn't interested in that. People of most religions preach on a moral life, good deads and peace unto others. Why be a missionary? Why sacrifice so much...to say basically the same thing? (live a moral life)
"No Bea, if such is the case I rather you leave people alone.Let them live under their societies in peace...just leave them alone"
I do not know if I can find words to describe the impact that these words had on me...
all I can say is:
I NEED A NEW HEART
and I cannot wait another 40 years to see if I get it.
I cannot and will not use Bible verses to stop God's discipline, God's confrontation, God's dealing in my life. NOT ANYMORE. I have done it enough, and enough is enough.
One last thing. Important thing.
If I am writing this it is because I have seen how God has had the power and wisdom and courage and strenght and love and care and so many things more...TO Deal with my heart.
I do see change in my heart. We still have a long ways to go, but we have done a lot. So this is why I now bodly write out:
The blood of Jesus can purify a heart.
posted by thisfool @ 5:44 AM
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