Job 38:2-3
THEN THE LORD ADDRESSED JOB OUT OF THE STORM AND SAID:
WHO IS THIS THAT OBSCURES DIVINE PLANS WITH WORDS OF IGNORANCE?
GIRD UP YOUR LOINS NOW, LIKE A MAN;
I WILL QUESTION YOU AND YOU TELL ME THE ANSWERS!
Job 38:2-3
Some scholars say that the book of Job is not a true story, it is more like a made up story to ilustrate important principles.
I believe that whoever makes such a statement has had a very easy life...
In my case this is the one man in the Bible that I truly can relate with. Job loves God and does his best to honor Him. Yet God crushes him into tiny tiny little pieces. Not only that, God remains silent for a while before He finally speaks. And when He does chose to speak He does not choose a soft, gentle wind like when He spoke to Elijah. God speaks to Job out of a storm.
Remember a real storm? The thunder? The lightning? The strong winds? The pouring rain?...the fear that it brought forth?
I totally relate to Job. God hitting him, okey: God allowing satan to hit Job. Blow one: no more richness, blow two: no more children all killed in a drastic, most drastic way; blow three: illness upon his body; blow three: his wife can't stand him any longer, he becomes a burdensome heavy load for her; blow four: his friends, dear friends can't find a way to help him and in their frustration end up filling him with false accusations.
Crushed. and Crushed by God.
What do you do in such a moment? I reacted like Job. After God had crushed me I sat down and said "Lord, I will not take another step until you answer my questions"
What did God say?
THE LORD ADDRESSED .."Bea Gasca"...OUT OF THE STORM AND SAID:
WHO IS THIS THAT OBSCURES DIVINE PLANS WITH WORDS OF IGNORANCE?
I WILL QUESTION YOU, AND YOU TELL ME THE ANSWERS!
I totally relate to Job. That guy was real. His story was real. THAT God is real.
What were the questions that I had asked God? I will tell you some, but first let me give you a bit of a back ground. How does one make a long story short?...I will not make a long story short..it seems to me that if I attempt to do something like that important truths may be left out and that may bring disaster forth. So let me just tell you that one wednesday morning I found out that one of the young men that lived on the streets, and whom I had met, had comitted suicide.
That was one of God's blows. We had visited him at the hospital not long before. We had prayed with him and we had offered to help him out. I started to tell him the story of the prodigal son. He smiled (he had a beautiful smile) and he told me "I know that story" and then he went on to tell me that a man would take hot chocolate and bread once a week. "We pretend to be listening so he will give us the hot cocoa." it was a good afternoon. I left the hospital full of hope. I knew Silje had a special connection with him and I truly thought that in time he would not only leave the streets but that he would be used in a mighty way to help others out.
I saw him a couple of nights before he committed suicide. He also walked with a huge smile on his face "Seño!" I did not recognize him, now he was soiled and wearing ragged clothes again.
On wednesday he committed suicide.
I did not take him home that night. WHY???
I was already in a turmoil. Too much activity had separated me from my clear communication from God. I did not hear God whisper or shout anymore. I was surrounded by disorder and darkness. My own mind and heart were a total chaos. I was not able to reach out. I was tired and confused. I was starting to sort things out but in that momment I could not reach out. And he died.
He was not the only one that died, many died or were deeply wounded during that time.
So close, yet so far away.
My own chaos, my own confusion brought death to those around me. Did God hold me responsible for it or did He say "poor Bea, it is not your fault?" God held me responsible for it. He still does. For He had tried to guide my steps, and I had chosen to do things my way. If you have any doubts please read Ezequiel 34.
This is one of the reasons I hesitate on going back to church. So much is done. So many activities to carry out. So many other projects to plan. And for me at least, it became a trap. A trap that took me away from my moving in step with God. I do not want to do it again.
I did not ask God "where are you in the midst of poverty? Why do you forsake Bolivia?" I did not ask these because I knew the answers. Bolivia is in deep poverty due to its idolatry and withcraft. But even more so, I believe Bolivia is deep in poverty because the church is not bringing light and justice into this nation. We do a lot of things. Congresses, seminars, concerts...more of the same...more of the same but bigger and more expensive...more of the same but in nicer hotels and bigger stadiums...
and some of that is needed and it is a blessing and it does help; but then we get too busy and we stop following the director of the orchestra. Suddenly, He is playing one tune. And everybody else is playing their own tune. And out of time. We do not hear Him when He says "instead of painting the churh building again, let us go out and feed the poor, I will show you how, and who." We do not hear Him when He says, you shoul pray asking for forgiveness for the nation, we are too busy programming a seminar. And then when chaos hits the city we do not hear Him say "go to the hospitals, hold people in my arms and tell them I am there", instead we gather...to pray. Totally of tune!
I was very angry with God. Like a wild animal I cried out MY questions:
Why God, why do you tolerate a sleeping church? Why do you allow us to wrap ourselves in a blanket of grace and to say "God will do His work in me...someday.?"
Why God, why did you open my eyes if you knew I would not be able to do anything? I am tired of only crying and praying for these people. I am tired of holding them in my arms as they die. A nation is dying in my own arms, and there is nothing I can do to awaken the church to see the need to sit down before you and just tune into your song. I speak and it is as if I speak chinesse, they do not understand!
I did not stop there, I raged on:
Father, I talk to them and all they do is point to the cross, and remind me of Grace. As if that would feed the poor, as if that would comfort the lonely, as if that would heal the sick, as if that would encourage the young ones to follow You wholeheartedly. I AM TIRED OF HEARING ON GRACE! Father! Why did you bring me to this place??? Why did you appoint me to wake up the church? It does not want to be awakened! Why did you not give me another task? Give me a tribe in Africa or something like that?
These were my questions.
God's answer was:
WHO IS THIS THAT OBSCURES DIVINE PLANS WITH WORDS OF IGNORANCE?
and 40 days of wrath,
plus 10 months of harsh discipline...
let me be honest...I still have some of them questions. BUT I have a little bit more light on the fact that the church is part of His Divine Plan...an awakend church is part of His Divine Plan.
A church that does not use grace to find a comfortable place to sleep, but a church that uses grace to turn back on sin and to shine in the midst of the darkest night in human history.
I also have a better understanding that God is God, and if He has appointed me with a mission it is best that I stop acting like a brat and just stop, and tune in with what He says.
And I also begin to visualize the fact that I have a great chance to succeed in my task, IF I tune in to God and do things His way. He will show me the WHO and the HOW...He knows the path.
I breath with joy at the thought that success is at my doorstep. I only have to tune in with God. A melody begins to ring in my heart. "He has a Divine Plan. Oh, wonderful plan, designed by the one I most love..."
May God give me GRACE to follow His tune!
Grace to move out of darkness.
Grace to move on...amazing grace, how sweet thy sound.
how sweet thy sound.
WHO IS THIS THAT OBSCURES DIVINE PLANS WITH WORDS OF IGNORANCE?
GIRD UP YOUR LOINS NOW, LIKE A MAN;
I WILL QUESTION YOU AND YOU TELL ME THE ANSWERS!
Job 38:2-3
Some scholars say that the book of Job is not a true story, it is more like a made up story to ilustrate important principles.
I believe that whoever makes such a statement has had a very easy life...
In my case this is the one man in the Bible that I truly can relate with. Job loves God and does his best to honor Him. Yet God crushes him into tiny tiny little pieces. Not only that, God remains silent for a while before He finally speaks. And when He does chose to speak He does not choose a soft, gentle wind like when He spoke to Elijah. God speaks to Job out of a storm.
Remember a real storm? The thunder? The lightning? The strong winds? The pouring rain?...the fear that it brought forth?
I totally relate to Job. God hitting him, okey: God allowing satan to hit Job. Blow one: no more richness, blow two: no more children all killed in a drastic, most drastic way; blow three: illness upon his body; blow three: his wife can't stand him any longer, he becomes a burdensome heavy load for her; blow four: his friends, dear friends can't find a way to help him and in their frustration end up filling him with false accusations.
Crushed. and Crushed by God.
What do you do in such a moment? I reacted like Job. After God had crushed me I sat down and said "Lord, I will not take another step until you answer my questions"
What did God say?
THE LORD ADDRESSED .."Bea Gasca"...OUT OF THE STORM AND SAID:
WHO IS THIS THAT OBSCURES DIVINE PLANS WITH WORDS OF IGNORANCE?
I WILL QUESTION YOU, AND YOU TELL ME THE ANSWERS!
I totally relate to Job. That guy was real. His story was real. THAT God is real.
What were the questions that I had asked God? I will tell you some, but first let me give you a bit of a back ground. How does one make a long story short?...I will not make a long story short..it seems to me that if I attempt to do something like that important truths may be left out and that may bring disaster forth. So let me just tell you that one wednesday morning I found out that one of the young men that lived on the streets, and whom I had met, had comitted suicide.
That was one of God's blows. We had visited him at the hospital not long before. We had prayed with him and we had offered to help him out. I started to tell him the story of the prodigal son. He smiled (he had a beautiful smile) and he told me "I know that story" and then he went on to tell me that a man would take hot chocolate and bread once a week. "We pretend to be listening so he will give us the hot cocoa." it was a good afternoon. I left the hospital full of hope. I knew Silje had a special connection with him and I truly thought that in time he would not only leave the streets but that he would be used in a mighty way to help others out.
I saw him a couple of nights before he committed suicide. He also walked with a huge smile on his face "Seño!" I did not recognize him, now he was soiled and wearing ragged clothes again.
On wednesday he committed suicide.
I did not take him home that night. WHY???
I was already in a turmoil. Too much activity had separated me from my clear communication from God. I did not hear God whisper or shout anymore. I was surrounded by disorder and darkness. My own mind and heart were a total chaos. I was not able to reach out. I was tired and confused. I was starting to sort things out but in that momment I could not reach out. And he died.
He was not the only one that died, many died or were deeply wounded during that time.
So close, yet so far away.
My own chaos, my own confusion brought death to those around me. Did God hold me responsible for it or did He say "poor Bea, it is not your fault?" God held me responsible for it. He still does. For He had tried to guide my steps, and I had chosen to do things my way. If you have any doubts please read Ezequiel 34.
This is one of the reasons I hesitate on going back to church. So much is done. So many activities to carry out. So many other projects to plan. And for me at least, it became a trap. A trap that took me away from my moving in step with God. I do not want to do it again.
I did not ask God "where are you in the midst of poverty? Why do you forsake Bolivia?" I did not ask these because I knew the answers. Bolivia is in deep poverty due to its idolatry and withcraft. But even more so, I believe Bolivia is deep in poverty because the church is not bringing light and justice into this nation. We do a lot of things. Congresses, seminars, concerts...more of the same...more of the same but bigger and more expensive...more of the same but in nicer hotels and bigger stadiums...
and some of that is needed and it is a blessing and it does help; but then we get too busy and we stop following the director of the orchestra. Suddenly, He is playing one tune. And everybody else is playing their own tune. And out of time. We do not hear Him when He says "instead of painting the churh building again, let us go out and feed the poor, I will show you how, and who." We do not hear Him when He says, you shoul pray asking for forgiveness for the nation, we are too busy programming a seminar. And then when chaos hits the city we do not hear Him say "go to the hospitals, hold people in my arms and tell them I am there", instead we gather...to pray. Totally of tune!
I was very angry with God. Like a wild animal I cried out MY questions:
Why God, why do you tolerate a sleeping church? Why do you allow us to wrap ourselves in a blanket of grace and to say "God will do His work in me...someday.?"
Why God, why did you open my eyes if you knew I would not be able to do anything? I am tired of only crying and praying for these people. I am tired of holding them in my arms as they die. A nation is dying in my own arms, and there is nothing I can do to awaken the church to see the need to sit down before you and just tune into your song. I speak and it is as if I speak chinesse, they do not understand!
I did not stop there, I raged on:
Father, I talk to them and all they do is point to the cross, and remind me of Grace. As if that would feed the poor, as if that would comfort the lonely, as if that would heal the sick, as if that would encourage the young ones to follow You wholeheartedly. I AM TIRED OF HEARING ON GRACE! Father! Why did you bring me to this place??? Why did you appoint me to wake up the church? It does not want to be awakened! Why did you not give me another task? Give me a tribe in Africa or something like that?
These were my questions.
God's answer was:
WHO IS THIS THAT OBSCURES DIVINE PLANS WITH WORDS OF IGNORANCE?
and 40 days of wrath,
plus 10 months of harsh discipline...
let me be honest...I still have some of them questions. BUT I have a little bit more light on the fact that the church is part of His Divine Plan...an awakend church is part of His Divine Plan.
A church that does not use grace to find a comfortable place to sleep, but a church that uses grace to turn back on sin and to shine in the midst of the darkest night in human history.
I also have a better understanding that God is God, and if He has appointed me with a mission it is best that I stop acting like a brat and just stop, and tune in with what He says.
And I also begin to visualize the fact that I have a great chance to succeed in my task, IF I tune in to God and do things His way. He will show me the WHO and the HOW...He knows the path.
I breath with joy at the thought that success is at my doorstep. I only have to tune in with God. A melody begins to ring in my heart. "He has a Divine Plan. Oh, wonderful plan, designed by the one I most love..."
May God give me GRACE to follow His tune!
Grace to move out of darkness.
Grace to move on...amazing grace, how sweet thy sound.
how sweet thy sound.
posted by thisfool @ 6:28 AM
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